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ickaimpWorking on gathering data for the Heiji page, came to a realization:
It's easier to list the episodes that Heiji -isn't- hurt in, than list the episodes that he's injured. ~_~
Voices are still voting 'Sadomachoist Boy' for a title.
And Ysabet's making fun of me because I ate a peanut butter, cheese and M&M sandwhich. (the M&Ms made it reallly good). I think she's weird.
Cross posted to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
manycases1truth
TGZ: Revenge of the Revenge of the PrOn.
A sudden scream from the depths of the house nearly made Kaito jump out of the guest room window. It wasn't just a 'eek! I saw a mouse' or 'oh, no we're out of coffee' scream, but one of true abject horror. The kind of scream you'd expect to rise out of the depths of hell.
And to top it off, it was a male's voice. Saguru's to be exact.
Expecting the worse, he had his card-gun out of the it's hiding place in the room and in his hand and was out the door in a matter of seconds. In deference to expediency, he decided to forgo the stairs and simply jumped over the barrister, grabbing the bottom of it on his way down to swing himself clear of the stairs, like a gymnast on the horizontal rails. He hit the floor running, momentum carrying him the rest of the way into the living room, where the scream originated.
Mentally braced himself for worse case scenarios and card-gun in hand with the safety off and ready to fire, it was a bit of a shock to find no one in the room other than Saguru and Mum.
A Saguru with no composure at all, pale-faced, wide eyed and pointing at the screen in terror. It took a moment for his mind to catch up and realise what was being shown on the screen.
Someone who was NOT the Kid was currently in the process of screwing like rabid ferrets with someone who looked somewhat similar to Saguru on the screen.
It was that porno that Kid had given Saguru for safe keeping. So that no one else would ever see it.
And Mum was watching it.
Feeling suddenly out of his depth, he quickly flicked the safety back on the gun, tucking it into the waistband of his pants, pulling his loose shirt over it to hide the bulge.
"MUM!!!" Saguru roared. "WHERE did you find this?!"
"Oh." Mum twinkled at her son --Kaito could almost see the sparkles in the air as she smiled-- "I discovered it in your room. I was in the mood for something a little different to watch. It was inside of a hollow book on your bookcase."
Saguru squeaked, looking both pale and red at the same time.
"Of course, I did have to break the lock on the box on the inside of the box to get to it. I used a hammer and a screwdriver, so it may not work quite as well anymore." She added as an afterthought.
"... You went -looking- for porn?!" Saguru questioned, his voice rising an octave or so higher during the course of the sentence. "In MY room?!"
Kaito was privately amazed she'd think to look in her son's room. He still hadn't found Saguru's porn stash, if the detective actually had one at all. Of course, he didn't have one here either, but he was a guest in the house so that was beside the point.
Mum shrugged. "I was missing your father, dear. We used to watch it together." She sighed wistfully.
The expression on Saguru's face clearly stated that he was in desperate need of a wire scrub brush and a large bottle of industrial strength cleaner to get those images out of his head. Kaito wasn't far behind.
"Saguru, dear..." The look on her face turned conniving. "Is there something you'd like to talk with Mummy about?"
"No." Saguru's voice was crystal sharp and clear on that point.
She giggled.
Kaito felt a bead of sweat slide down the back of his head. This looked really really bad from an outside perspective, now that he thought about it. Saguru didn't keep any visible porn that a normal teenage guy would normally keep around and the only hidden stuff was of someone who looked like him starkers and boffing with the phantom thief Saguru had sworn to catch.
"Mo-ther." Saguru said through gritted teeth. "That was given to me for safe keeping."
"Really?" Mum brightened. "Who?"
Kaito could see Saguru's clenched fists and white knuckles from where he stood. The blond was -mad-. "Someone important to me." He growled.
"Was it that Kaitou Kit you're so fond of chasing?" She chirped, almost clapping her hands in glee. Kaito rolled his eyes. Kid, not kit. He wasn't a baby fox.
"If you must know, yes." Saguru stalked over to the entertainment centre and hit the 'eject' button on the dvd player with more force than strictly necessarily. "Some moron attempted to publish this rubbish and sell it. The idiot thief stole the master copy and gave it to me as a -courtesy- to my -privacy-. Something which it would be nice if other people would respect as well."
Mum responded by sulking. "So I'm not allowed to watch?"
Geh. Very geh.
"No." Saguru said bluntly. "And you get to pay for fixing the the lock on the strong box. -This- is going somewhere else."
Posture perfectly straight and carrying himself like a battlefield banner, Saguru walked out of the room and up the stairs. Mum pouted upon spotting Kaito.
"Do you-"
Kaito held his hands up and quickly retreated back upstairs as well. "Not a chance."
Scary woman, scary woman, scary woman.... He was pretty sure 'Kaasan would give him an interesting talk if she found the dvd too.
... come to think of it, that was one of the reasons he'd given it to Saguru in the first place. He didn't -think- 'Kaasan knew about Oyaji's hidden room, but he really wasn't sure....
He'd barely made it to Saguru's door before the blond's hand reached out, grabbed him by the front of the shirt and dragged him inside, the door slamming shut behind them. Part of mind screamed in horror at being locked in a room like this, but the rest of his mind was too occupied with Saguru's irritated face centimetres from his own.
"You." Saguru growled, pressed close enough against him that Kaito was pretty sure that the detective could feel that yes, that was a card-gun in his pants and yes, he was happy to see him. "Are going to help me do two things."
"Oh?" Pride hackled at the bit. Lock -him- in a room and tell him what to do? Not bloody likely.
"One." The disk, sans cover was held up between them. "You are going to help me hide this where Mum can never find it again."
Okay, that one he could agree to. Fair enough. "And?"
"Two." Saguru's fierce expression faded to a somewhat shaky leer. "Want to watch this sometime when Mum's not around? You've never seen it, have you?"
Only once, but he'd been too busy tried to hide his reactions to Saguru's reactions at the time. And he was pretty sure that Saguru still had that list of errors around here somewhere.
Together, it'd be entertaining to find a few more things mock it with. Especially since this time he didn't have to worry about keeping a straight face while watching it.
He grinned, grabbing the disk from Saguru's hand and making it disappear with a snap of his fingers and a puff of smoke.
"Deal."
-fin-
It's easier to list the episodes that Heiji -isn't- hurt in, than list the episodes that he's injured. ~_~
Voices are still voting 'Sadomachoist Boy' for a title.
And Ysabet's making fun of me because I ate a peanut butter, cheese and M&M sandwhich. (the M&Ms made it reallly good). I think she's weird.
Cross posted to
manycases1truthTGZ: Revenge of the Revenge of the PrOn.
A sudden scream from the depths of the house nearly made Kaito jump out of the guest room window. It wasn't just a 'eek! I saw a mouse' or 'oh, no we're out of coffee' scream, but one of true abject horror. The kind of scream you'd expect to rise out of the depths of hell.
And to top it off, it was a male's voice. Saguru's to be exact.
Expecting the worse, he had his card-gun out of the it's hiding place in the room and in his hand and was out the door in a matter of seconds. In deference to expediency, he decided to forgo the stairs and simply jumped over the barrister, grabbing the bottom of it on his way down to swing himself clear of the stairs, like a gymnast on the horizontal rails. He hit the floor running, momentum carrying him the rest of the way into the living room, where the scream originated.
Mentally braced himself for worse case scenarios and card-gun in hand with the safety off and ready to fire, it was a bit of a shock to find no one in the room other than Saguru and Mum.
A Saguru with no composure at all, pale-faced, wide eyed and pointing at the screen in terror. It took a moment for his mind to catch up and realise what was being shown on the screen.
Someone who was NOT the Kid was currently in the process of screwing like rabid ferrets with someone who looked somewhat similar to Saguru on the screen.
It was that porno that Kid had given Saguru for safe keeping. So that no one else would ever see it.
And Mum was watching it.
Feeling suddenly out of his depth, he quickly flicked the safety back on the gun, tucking it into the waistband of his pants, pulling his loose shirt over it to hide the bulge.
"MUM!!!" Saguru roared. "WHERE did you find this?!"
"Oh." Mum twinkled at her son --Kaito could almost see the sparkles in the air as she smiled-- "I discovered it in your room. I was in the mood for something a little different to watch. It was inside of a hollow book on your bookcase."
Saguru squeaked, looking both pale and red at the same time.
"Of course, I did have to break the lock on the box on the inside of the box to get to it. I used a hammer and a screwdriver, so it may not work quite as well anymore." She added as an afterthought.
"... You went -looking- for porn?!" Saguru questioned, his voice rising an octave or so higher during the course of the sentence. "In MY room?!"
Kaito was privately amazed she'd think to look in her son's room. He still hadn't found Saguru's porn stash, if the detective actually had one at all. Of course, he didn't have one here either, but he was a guest in the house so that was beside the point.
Mum shrugged. "I was missing your father, dear. We used to watch it together." She sighed wistfully.
The expression on Saguru's face clearly stated that he was in desperate need of a wire scrub brush and a large bottle of industrial strength cleaner to get those images out of his head. Kaito wasn't far behind.
"Saguru, dear..." The look on her face turned conniving. "Is there something you'd like to talk with Mummy about?"
"No." Saguru's voice was crystal sharp and clear on that point.
She giggled.
Kaito felt a bead of sweat slide down the back of his head. This looked really really bad from an outside perspective, now that he thought about it. Saguru didn't keep any visible porn that a normal teenage guy would normally keep around and the only hidden stuff was of someone who looked like him starkers and boffing with the phantom thief Saguru had sworn to catch.
"Mo-ther." Saguru said through gritted teeth. "That was given to me for safe keeping."
"Really?" Mum brightened. "Who?"
Kaito could see Saguru's clenched fists and white knuckles from where he stood. The blond was -mad-. "Someone important to me." He growled.
"Was it that Kaitou Kit you're so fond of chasing?" She chirped, almost clapping her hands in glee. Kaito rolled his eyes. Kid, not kit. He wasn't a baby fox.
"If you must know, yes." Saguru stalked over to the entertainment centre and hit the 'eject' button on the dvd player with more force than strictly necessarily. "Some moron attempted to publish this rubbish and sell it. The idiot thief stole the master copy and gave it to me as a -courtesy- to my -privacy-. Something which it would be nice if other people would respect as well."
Mum responded by sulking. "So I'm not allowed to watch?"
Geh. Very geh.
"No." Saguru said bluntly. "And you get to pay for fixing the the lock on the strong box. -This- is going somewhere else."
Posture perfectly straight and carrying himself like a battlefield banner, Saguru walked out of the room and up the stairs. Mum pouted upon spotting Kaito.
"Do you-"
Kaito held his hands up and quickly retreated back upstairs as well. "Not a chance."
Scary woman, scary woman, scary woman.... He was pretty sure 'Kaasan would give him an interesting talk if she found the dvd too.
... come to think of it, that was one of the reasons he'd given it to Saguru in the first place. He didn't -think- 'Kaasan knew about Oyaji's hidden room, but he really wasn't sure....
He'd barely made it to Saguru's door before the blond's hand reached out, grabbed him by the front of the shirt and dragged him inside, the door slamming shut behind them. Part of mind screamed in horror at being locked in a room like this, but the rest of his mind was too occupied with Saguru's irritated face centimetres from his own.
"You." Saguru growled, pressed close enough against him that Kaito was pretty sure that the detective could feel that yes, that was a card-gun in his pants and yes, he was happy to see him. "Are going to help me do two things."
"Oh?" Pride hackled at the bit. Lock -him- in a room and tell him what to do? Not bloody likely.
"One." The disk, sans cover was held up between them. "You are going to help me hide this where Mum can never find it again."
Okay, that one he could agree to. Fair enough. "And?"
"Two." Saguru's fierce expression faded to a somewhat shaky leer. "Want to watch this sometime when Mum's not around? You've never seen it, have you?"
Only once, but he'd been too busy tried to hide his reactions to Saguru's reactions at the time. And he was pretty sure that Saguru still had that list of errors around here somewhere.
Together, it'd be entertaining to find a few more things mock it with. Especially since this time he didn't have to worry about keeping a straight face while watching it.
He grinned, grabbing the disk from Saguru's hand and making it disappear with a snap of his fingers and a puff of smoke.
"Deal."
-fin-
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2005-07-24 03:35 am (UTC)Yay for Kaito! :)
hilarious
Date: 2005-07-24 03:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-07-24 04:59 pm (UTC)I think you're both weird and I haven't really talked to Ysabet XDD
Ah, well...funny thing is that that charm Kazuha gave him is supposed to protect him. If he gets this injured when WEARING it, imagine how beaten up
or deadhe would be if he DIDN'T have it? ^_^;And the porn is love >D
no subject
Date: 2005-07-24 07:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-07-24 09:37 pm (UTC)Hakuba's mom IS scary. Oh, btw, um, you spelled p0rn "Pr0n" in the title. Just thought I'd let you know.
no subject
Date: 2005-07-25 02:28 am (UTC)Voices are scarred... o.O
no subject
Date: 2005-07-25 07:11 pm (UTC)imagine Mum's reaction to seeing that in their current situation...! lol Mum is awesome! and hakuba and kaito are just too much fun...
*mad cackling heard emerging from the kitchen*
Date: 2005-07-26 07:30 pm (UTC)... Icka, I've gotta agree with Ysabet. That is one odd combo. Then again, my mom puts peanut butter on cold pizza. *smirk* Spousie is still scarred from that episode...