[fanfic] PYP: The Talk

[ickaimp]

Woke up this morning to Blue on Black by Kenny Wayne Shepherd in our head. Haven't heard the song in ages. Voices kinda think of it as a Toichi song, with the 'dead man's touch' bit. (course, Aoko = Blue Child, Kuroba = Black Feather)

Chorus:
Hey Blue on Black, Tears on a river. Push on a shove, it don't mean much
Joker on Jack, Match on a fire. Cold on ice, It's a dead man's touch
Whisper on a scream, doesn't change a thing. Don't bring you back... Blue on black.
Oh yeah, Blue on Black

Interesting way to wake up. ^^;;

Overheard line of the day at the store:
Kid: Look Mom! Can I have Scooby Snacks?!
Mother: No, those are for dogs, honey.
Kid *dejected*: aww...

Um... some Post-PYP silliness. ^^;;

+++

As a general rule, Kuroba Kaito did not get nervous.

In his two major fields of experience, as a magician and a thief, getting nervous meant mistakes. Mistakes meant either humiliation or capture, or both, depending on which persona he was at the time. Both of which were equally not as good. He had a reputation to uphold.

So therefore, it took a lot to get Kaito nervous. Usually it involved his twin, Kudo Shin'ichi or his shrunken form, Edogawa Conan, a lot of cops and usually some sort of interesting toy such as a helicopter or high-tech sneakers to make him break out into a sweat.

Kuroba Kaito was currently sweating.

And to the best of his knowledge, his smaller older brother was still in Beika, which was nowhere near close to the Neyagawa-shi part of Osaka.

No, what was making him sweat was a small slip of a girl who was leaning in so close to his face that he could smell that she had eaten takoyaki earlier that day as she cornered him against a wall.

Of course, after years of dealing with Aoko, he was of the option that small slips of girls were more dangerous than any big burly policeman could possibly be.

Turquoise eyes that were on this side of green instead of blue narrowed at him. "So you're Heiji's cousin."

He smiled at her, a bead of sweat sliding down the back of his neck. "Yup. Kuroba Kaito, at your service. And you are?"

"Toyama Kazuha." It sounded more like a knell of doom then a name. She leaned back, giving him a bit of space to breath as she crossed her arms. "It's funny, Heiji talks about you about as much as he does Kudo, yet neither his Okan or Oton know which side of the family you're from."

After some soul-searching, Heiji had chosen to not to talk to his parents about his being adopted. He'd never felt anything but loved by them, and didn't feel it was worth the heartache and confusion it would bring by bringing the truth out. So while it saved his whole family some heartache, it made things a little confusing when 'The Cousins' got together.

Kaito privately thought that it was amusing that his family, who dealt in misdirection and lies, were honest about their true connections while the families who sought to uncover the truth continued their own charades. Neither Saguru nor Shin'ichi had told their parents either.

"Same Grandfather he got his dark skin colouring from." Kaito quickly adlibbed, a grin on his face. Not too much of a stretch, really. Considering that Heiji had really gotten his colouring from the laboratory that created them, not some fictional Grandfather.

"Hmm." Kazuha did not look impressed as she mused over this tidbit of information. "So how come he only met you a little while ago?"

"Bit of an accident, bit of a coincidence." His grin grew a little wider and he realised it was growing just a bit strained. "We only discovered a branch of the family that was missing recently."

Her eyes narrowed at him further, reminding him of that one phrase about shooting daggers with the eyes. "You know that Heiji and I grew up together, right?"

"Uh, yes. He's mentioned it before." Blushing slightly the entire time as he explained why he always wore an omamori. Merely 'childhood friends', his ass.

"Good. Then you understand that I won't allow anyone to hurt Heiji." Her hands moved to her hips as she leaned in again, a private fang-filled smirk filling his vision. "I'm wearing boots."

He glanced down to realise, that yes she was. American Cowboy style ones, with what looked like pointed metal toes. "So you are."

The grin grew wider. "Did you know that in America, they call them 'Shit kickers'?"

That was a new one. "No..."

"Do you know why they call them 'Shit kickers?"

He got the feeling that she was going to tell him anyway, and he would not like the answer. "...no..."

The fang-filled grin turned down right vicious. "Cause they'll Kick the Shit outta you."

That he would believe, very much indeed. She looked like a crotch-kicker too.

"Which will happen, if you do anythin' to hurt Heiji." She leaned back again, giving him some room again, practically oozing smugness. "Do we understand each other?"

"Perfectly." He nodded.

Given time, he could probably win her over and they could be friends. Now however was neither the time nor the place for that.

"Goooooooood."

"Oi, Kaito!" Heiji finally chose that moment to join them, pulling on a jacket as he did so. "Sorry for keeping you waitin'. I couldn't find my wallet."

"Not a problem!" He grinned, assuring his cousin. He'd place good money that a certain pony tailed girl knew exactly why said wallet had been missing.

Kazuha gave them a friendly grin and a wave as Heiji slipped on his shoes, all sweetness and light radiating off of her. "Have a good time you two!"

"Later, Ka-chan." Heiji gave her a smile and a wave in response as they walked out the door. Kaito didn't bother with a grin, he just waved as he shut the door behind him.

"Oi, Heiji?" He waited until they were a bit away from the house before catching his cousin's attention.

"Yeah?"

"...We're not dating, are we?"

"W-what?!" Heiji stumbled and nearly fell over. "No! What the hell brought that on?!"

Kaito scratched the back of his head before motioning back towards the house. "Cause I just got 'The Older Brother Speech' from your girlfriend there."

"She's not my girlfriend!" Heiji growled surly, moodily thrusting his hands in his pockets. He grumbled for a moment before raising an eyebrow. "Was it the shovel one?"

"No." The 'I have a shovel and know how to use it' line was always amusing and pretty effective. He had snickered for hours after he'd seen Hakuba use that line on a prospective suitor of Aoko's. "Shit kickers."

"Ah." Heiji nodded tiredly. "Sorry about that."

Kaito waved it off with a shrug. "Eh. Just do me one favour."

"Yeah?"

"Keep your girl away from my girl." He smirked. "I don't think we poor boys would survive it if they teamed up."

Heiji snickered in response.

-fin-

Okan = Kansai-ben for 'Okaasan', or Mother
Oton = Kansai-ben for 'Otousan' or Father

Orginal mental pic was Aoko giving Hakuba 'The Talk' before he and Kaito went off to do homework. But we've done enough B&W stuff lately, so the Voices switched over to Kazuha giving it to Shin'ichi before he and Heiji went off on a case. Which was amusing, but we couldn't figure out how Shin'ichi would be there and not Conan.
Then this hit and we giggled ourself silly.

The Shit Kickers line we orginally read in a Gargoyles fic by Christi Smith Hayden. My Dad and my former Supervisor used it on different occasions and it kinda got stuck in our mental vocabulary.
Inspired by the knee-high boots Kazuha's wearing throughout the 7th movie. *jealous, jealous*

Hakuba using the shovel line can be found here ^^;;

Ever notice that it doesn't sound like Heiji calls her 'Kazuha'? Ran says 'Kazuha' and you can hear it, but it sounds more like Heiji's shorted her name to 'Ka-chan' or something like that... o_O

Comments

[ickaimp.livejournal.com]

argh! Thank you!
that didn't look right, but that's what one of my notes said.
fixed both.